Pride and Prejudice Translated into Academiotics (and More Fun with Scholarly Jargon)

Over at The New York­er, Vic­to­ria Dai­ley is hav­ing a lit­tle fun trans­lat­ing lines from Jane Austen’s Pride Prej­u­dice into “Acad­e­mi­otics” — in short, aca­d­e­m­ic speak. Here’s a lit­tle taste for you:

“It is a truth uni­ver­sal­ly acknowl­edged, that a sin­gle man in pos­ses­sion of a good for­tune, must be in want of a wife.”

Trans­la­tion:

The het­ero­gene­ity of assumed inten­tions may incur a con­clu­so­ry stereo­type regard­ing gen­der selec­tions in mar­riage-based soci­eties, espe­cial­ly in those where the mas­cu­line hege­mo­ny of cap­i­tal resources pre­sup­pos­es the fem­i­niza­tion of prop­er­ty and uxo­r­i­al acqui­si­tion.

Is tak­ing shots at human­ists not your favorite sport? It’s just too easy? Maybe spoof­ing social sci­en­tists is more your thing? Then you can read all about the Ser­bian aca­d­e­mics who recent­ly pub­lished  a com­plete­ly fab­ri­cat­ed arti­cle in a Roman­ian jour­nal. The pub­lished arti­cle itself, “Eval­u­a­tion of trans­for­ma­tive hermeneu­tic heuris­tics for pro­cess­ing ran­dom data,” appears on Scribd.

Relat­ed Con­tent:

John Sear­le on Fou­cault and the Obscu­ran­tism in French Phi­los­o­phy

Noam Chom­sky Slams Žižek and Lacan: Emp­ty ‘Pos­tur­ing’

The Recipes of Icon­ic Authors: Jane Austen, Sylvia Plath, Roald Dahl, the Mar­quis de Sade & More