HavÂing the abilÂiÂty to virÂtuÂalÂly explore the hisÂtoÂry, back stoÂries, and culÂturÂal sigÂnifÂiÂcance of artÂworks from over a thouÂsand museÂums genÂerÂates nowhere near the exciteÂment as a feaÂture allowÂing users to upload selfÂies in hopes of locatÂing an InstaÂgram-worÂthy dopÂpelÂgänger someÂwhere in this vast digÂiÂtal colÂlecÂtion.
On the othÂer hand, if this low-brow innoÂvaÂtion leads great hordes of milÂlenÂniÂals and iGen-ers to cross the threshÂolds of museÂums in over 70 counÂtries, who are we to critÂiÂcize?
So what if their priÂmaÂry motiÂvaÂtion is snapÂping anothÂer selfÂie with their FlemÂish RenaisÂsance twin? As long as one or two develÂop a pasÂsion for art, or a parÂticÂuÂlar museÂum, artist, or periÂod, we’re good.
Alas, some disÂgrunÂtled users (probÂaÂbly Gen X‑ers and Baby Boomers) are givÂing the Google Arts & CulÂture app (iPhone-Android) one-star reviews, based on their inabilÂiÂty to find the only feaÂture for which they downÂloaded it.
Allow us to walk you through.
After installing the app (iPhone-Android) on your phone or tablet, scroll down the homeÂpage to the quesÂtion “Is your porÂtrait in a museÂum?”
The samÂpling of artÂworks framÂing this quesÂtion sugÂgest that the answer may be yes, regardÂless of your race, though one need not be a GuerilÂla Girl to wonÂder if CauÂcasian users are drawÂing their matchÂes from a far largÂer pool than users of colÂor…
Click “get startÂed.” (You’ll have to allow the app to access your device’s camÂera.)
Take a selfÂie. (I supÂpose you could hedge your bets by switchÂing the camÂera to front-facÂing oriÂenÂtaÂtion and aimÂing it at a pleasÂing pre-existÂing headÂshot.)
The app will immeÂdiÂateÂly anaÂlyze the selfÂie, and withÂin secÂonds, boom! Say helÂlo to your five closÂest matchÂes.
In the name of sciÂence, I subÂjectÂed myself to this process, grinÂning as if I was sitÂting for my fourth grade school picÂture. I and received the folÂlowÂing results, none of them highÂer than 47%:
VicÂtoÂrio C. Edades’ MothÂer and DaughÂter (flatÂterÂingÂly, I was pegged as the daughÂter, though at 52, the resemÂblance to the mothÂer is a far truer match.)
GusÂtave Courbet’s Jo, la Belle Irlandaise (Say what? She’s got long red hair and skin like Snow White!)
HenÂry Inman’s porÂtrait of PresÂiÂdent MarÂtin Van Buren’s daughÂter-in-law and defacÂto White House hostÂess, AngelÂiÂca SinÂgleÂton Van Buren (Well, she looks ….conÂgeÂnial. I do enjoy parÂties…)
and Sir AnthoÂny van Dyck’s post-mortem paintÂing of VeneÂtia, Lady DigÂby, on her Deathbed (Um…)
HopÂing that a difÂferÂent pose might yield a highÂer match I chanÂneled artist Nina KatchadouriÂan, and adoptÂed a more painterÂly pose, unsmilÂing, head cocked, one hand lyriÂcalÂly restÂing on my breastÂbone… for good meaÂsure, I moved away from the winÂdow. This time I got:
Joseph Stella’s Boy with a BagÂpipe (Maybe this wasn’t such a hot idea with regard to my self-image?)
CipriÂano Efsio Oppo PorÂtrait of IsabelÂla (See above.)
Adolph Tidemand’s PorÂtrait of Guro SilÂversÂdatÂter TraÂvenÂdal (Is this uniÂverse telling me it’s BabushÂka Time?)
Johannes ChrisÂtiann Janson’s A Woman CutÂting Bread (aka Renounce All VanÂiÂty Time?)
and Anders Zorn’s MadonÂna (This is where the mean cheerÂleader leaps out of the bathÂroom stall and calls me the horse from GuerÂniÂca, right?)
MerÂciÂfulÂly, none of these results topped the 50% mark, nor did any of the experÂiÂments I conÂductÂed using selfÂies of my teenage son (whose 4th closÂest match had a long white beard).
PerÂhaps there are still a few bugs to work out?
If you’re temptÂed to give Google Arts and Culture’s experÂiÂmenÂtal porÂtrait feaÂture a go, please let us know how it worked out by postÂing a comÂment below. Maybe we’re twins, I mean, triplets!
If such folderol is beneath you, please avail yourÂself of the app’s origÂiÂnal feaÂtures:
- Zoom Views — ExpeÂriÂence every detail of the world’s greatÂest treaÂsures
- VirÂtuÂal RealÂiÂty — Grab your Google CardÂboard viewÂer and immerse yourÂself in arts and culÂture
- Browse by time and colÂor — Explore artÂworks by filÂterÂing them by colÂor or time periÂod
- VirÂtuÂal tours — Step inside the most famous museÂums in the world and visÂit iconÂic landÂmarks
- PerÂsonÂal colÂlecÂtion — Save your favorite artÂworks and share your colÂlecÂtions with friends
- NearÂby — Find museÂums and culÂturÂal events around you
- Exhibits — Take guidÂed tours curatÂed by experts
- DaiÂly digest — Learn someÂthing new every time you open the app
- Art RecÂogÂnizÂer — Learn more about artÂworks at select museÂums by pointÂing your device camÂera at them, even when offline
- NotiÂfiÂcaÂtions — subÂscribe to receive updates on the top arts & culÂture stoÂries
DownÂload Google Arts and CulÂture or update to VerÂsion 6.0.17 here (for Mac) or here (for Android).
Note: We’re getÂting reports that the app doesÂn’t seem to be availÂable in every geoÂgraphÂiÂcal locaÂtion. If it’s not availÂable where you live, we apolÂoÂgize in advance.
RelatÂed ConÂtent:
Google Art Project Expands, BringÂing 30,000 Works of Art from 151 MuseÂums to the Web
Ayun HalÂlÂiÂday is an author, illusÂtraÂtor, theÂater makÂer and Chief PriÂmaÂtolÂoÂgist of the East VilÂlage Inky zine. FolÂlow her @AyunHalliday.